Fat People Are EVERYWHERE! My Doctor Wants Me To Get Weight Loss Surgery

It is true. We are.

I wrote about body stuff here, and then soon after that she rebutted her fat shamer, and now I read this.

It is hard out there for a Fatty. It is hard out there for this Fat person.

Which is why I wrote my post about needing my friends to support me the other day.  My doctor’s appointment included him explaining to me that I was healthy: My heart, lungs, blood pressure, blood sugar, thyroid, and everything else was in tip top shape. But they might not be forever. He said he thought I should consider weight loss surgery. He said, I am healthy now, but ten more years with this fat on me and I might not be so healthy. I think that is called preventative weight loss surgery?

Get my stomach stapled, just in case my fat makes me unhealthy.



someecards.com - I think my ass is beginning to affect the tides.“But doc, I would have depression even if I were skinny…”

Well maybe Jasmine, it could go away if you lose weight.

“But doc, I would have ADD even if I were skinny…”

Well maybe Jasmine, it could go away if you lose weight.

“But doc, my blood sugar levels are awesome and have been for the last three years.”

They are now, but we need to keep you on this medication to make sure you don’t develop type 2 Diabetes (again) and to make sure if you do get it, it doesn’t get worse.

“But what about when I weighed 200, and 199 and still had these problems, Doc?”

Well, you were obese then so those aren’t good examples.

Navigating body, body image, health, and all the definitions therein, is so overwhelming to me, as Fat person. Because- no matter how I slice it, no matter how much I exercise, what food choices I change or improve, no matter what blood panels or diagnostics say- most doctors, and people, look at me and say: She is unhealthy, she is Fat.

But those things don’t equal each other. Me being “skinny” doesn’t mean I will magically be healthier.

And it makes me angry.

I am mad about being Fat and being judged.



  1. You are so right Jazz. In our culture we do look at someone and judge the outside cover. One of my favorite commercials has two people sitting next to each other in a diner, one fat and one skinny, and then they tell us the skinny woman has high blood pressure and the fat guy is just fine. You make great choices everyday for your health and you set a great example for the other four of us. When you want something you have it now in a time when you have the strength to take it in stride instead of waiting till your will is gone and you go over board. Keep up what you do because I know you are amazing and

    Also, sexy as hell.

  2. I am not your husband, I am old, I am wise and you are a sexy, vibrant beautiful woman. I would be pissed off of someone said this to my daughter. Would you?

    • Its ok to ban me from commenting on your ubercool blog until I join the 21rst century and learn to type comments from my phone.

    • I’d be so pissed if someone told Addison that… but the power of a “doctor” tends to be a strong one. People think doctors are the end opinion on health. The truth is, I am very healthy and the things I deal with medically I would deal with if I were “skinny”… so yeah, I am pissed.

  3. I’m not your husband so I’m not required to agree that you’re sexy as hell but you are.
    So weight loss surgery is a choice you should make because YOU want it, YOU need it and because YOU feel your weight is holding you back from living the way you want to. So my bike riding, jogging, Zumba ASS Shakin Bombshell … Is your weight holding you back?

    • I don’t feel that it is holding me back. Only socially do I have to put up with judgement… but skinny girls get judged too. I feel like people focus on fat like it is BAD- and it isn’t about being chubby… it is about being FIT!

  4. Okay. Be angry. When you get thru being pissed, think about getting yourself in a healthier state for your babies and, more importantly in many ways yourself. If that means losing weight, then that is what you will do. Not because your friends are judging you…are you doing that yourself? I really like the person of you. You are bright, witty, creative, sensitive and living. I hope you are around for decades. IF you decide to follow up on your dic’s advice, I want you to talk with a friend of mine who is a bariatric surgeon in NWA. He will shoot you straight. You are right, surgery is not the answer to all of the issues you have discussed. The key is, is it the answer to your health issues. There are, of course, other ways than surgery, but I know you are very active and probably a healthy eater. Enough of my unsolicited motherly advice….take care of yourself friend.

      • I was crying when I posted that… so yeah, I didn’t edit. Just hit send. ;) Thanks for the spellcheck.

        • Ah! nevermind… that was about Deb’s comment. Ignore me, I am just the blogger.

      • Love that I did that! Also, you are living, but you are loving as well:) My fingers are too big to type on my phone!

    • Thanks Debbie. I don’t know what I am going to do. Is your friend Dr. Roller, that is who he wants me to see….

      • Yes. Josh is really good. He and his wife are friends of ours thru our daughter. We’ve known them for several years.

        • Ahhh. I see. So that makes sense on your stance on the whole surgery thing.

  5. Oh, oh, oh. Yes, yes, yes. I had a mini-meltdown this weekend because I went to go buy a couple of outfits for the Non-Con and the pants that I ended up buying had one extra X than I remember needing the last time I went to buy pants (which is like, NEVER, because I always put myself last and have mom-guilt whenever I buy myself something. But that’s another story).

    I am to the point now where I feel like there is a lot of outward judgment, but when I’m honest with myself, it’s me judging myself and I’m *projecting* it onto other people.

    As much as I love having the “happy to be me, so pass the damned bacon” persona, the truth is that I’m not as healthy as I could be, and I don’t want to be happy now and then 10 or 15 years down the road have run my body down and wish I could go back to fix everything. I have to fix it now. I actually had a bit of major bloggy inspiration last week and now I have something that I’m working on to be revealed….

    just as soon as I get through eating the Mom Tax I place on my kids’ Halloween candy.

    • Kym,

      Do tell… you aren’t allowed to come and comment and be all cryptic- what inspired plans do you have?!

    • Thanks Vikki! Fat shame is a insidious kind. Sometimes you don’t even realize it is happen. Like a ninja style shame or some shit!

  6. This seems scary to me, not just the recommendation, but that its so obvious you aren’t really being seen without bias, so how can you be sure any part of your health is being properly seen? Horrible. I’m so glad you are standing up for yourself and speaking out,

  7. Jazz,
    you are a rock star! You are healthy! I want to tell you that my mom and my grandmother had the surgury in question…Feel free to come to coffee and we can chat! I think your lifestyle choices are so important!!! What you eat and how you groooove. I know you dance and eat well…Yes, you look good! and i really have no complete thought so lets chat sometime!

  8. The fat bias is everywhere in our culture and the anti woman bias in addition is a toxic stew, especially in medicine. I have another friend who is in terrible health, needs the surgery, but her doctor refuses, and told her to just lose weight. To me, it seems as though fat women are punished no matter what they do.When I had severe morning sickness, my chart was annotated”severely restricts food intake, possible eating disorder” ,whereas the thin women I know who suffer from Hyper emesis are given prescription drugs to prevent nausea and vomiting. When my blood sugar is normal, they test again like it is unbelievable that a fat woman be healthy. I wish I could verbalize what I think about this issue, but emotionally it is too much, and I can’t. Oh, and you are a hottie, and a healthy one to boot.

  9. I lost nearly 100lbs after Addy was born and have an normal BMI, but I still have horrible ADD. Being skinny is not the be-all and end-all to health. From what I see you post here and on Facebook, you cook healthy meals for your family, exercise by yourself and with your family regularly, and most importantly, you have a POSITIVE outlook on life. No matter what life throws at you, you seem to tackle it. You have healthy-looking hair, skin, and coloring. All of those are indicative of a healthy person.

    If you want to lose weight, do it. If you want to try it on your own without surgery, go for it. If you’re happy with the way you are, then say screw the doctor’s opinion. The fact is that while certain ailments tend to go hand-in-hand with obesity, it doesn’t mean every obese person has them.

    You’re a beautiful person, inside and out. Never forget that!

    • Thanks for the encouragement Holly… and WOW! 100 lbs is a huge accomplishment.

  10. Jasmine, I had met you at AWBU. You are so beautiful and vibrant, not to mention an inspiration! This is a very personal decision. I would struggle as well (I know that’s easy for a little person to say). I know you’ll do your research. Whatever you decide will be right for you and I’ll still think the world of you.

    • Delat, you are so kind. Thank you very much for your concern and encouragement.

  11. Skinny does not equal healthy. You can be overweight, even obese, and be healthy. You can be of average weight and in a normal weight range, and be unhealthy. You can be skinny and be unhealthy. Weight loss is not a magic cure-all.

    With that said, I used to weigh 331 lbs. Almost three years ago, I had weight loss surgery – gastric bypass surgery. I am currently 162 lbs, and have been maintaining my weight loss successfully (so far). At the time of my surgery, I was morbidly obese, but healthy. I know, I know, it boggled my doctors too. *eyeroll* A fat person who *wasn’t* suffering from every possible obesity caused/related condition? Surely you jest! I had the surgery to get to a healthy weight, to hopefully prevent myself from developing the numerous health conditions that ran in my family and were caused/worsened by morbid obesity — including type 2 diabetes, hypertension, and heart disease. But I also had the surgery because I was 25 years old and my knees hurt. And, oh yeah: I was sick of being fat. And I wanted to live a hopefully longer, hopefully healthier life.

    Now, with THAT said: I still stand by the belief that weight loss is not a magic cure-all. My husband, who is 5’10” and 215 lbs., has sleep apnea. Granted, he is overweight, and needs to lose about 20 lbs to get back into a healthy-ish range for his height and build, but still, I look askance at his family physician for suggesting that losing five pounds would lose the sleep apnea, too. Five pounds ago was eight months ago, and he had sleep apnea then, too.

    Research weight loss surgery and speak to both health professionals in the field and people who have had it only if YOU want it. Have the surgery to lose weight and maintain your health and/or improve it. But don’t let your doctor bug or bully you about it.

    • Thanks for the input Jenn! I am happy you made a choice for your body that worked well. It is really hard for me to justify a surgery that is SO major for being tired of being fat. I am 27, but I do the things in life I want to do and my size has only held me back from wearing size 10 jeans. I am still thinking, researching, and determining what is best for me.

  12. I don’t even know you, have never read your blog until today, but it resonates. I have also had a doctor tell me I need to lose weight. Not because I was unhealthy, but because I was over my BMI. BUT not because I “failed” any other measure of health. This makes me sick. Now that they have made new guidelines for lady physicals I may not go to a doctor for the next three years. I think the medical system and the patriarchy conspire to make women feel we are never good enough – no matter how well you eat, or exercise, or more importantly, feel!

    • I just don’t trust some arbitrary BMI number that doesn’t respect the uniqueness of my body. I agree Rebecca! Thanks for stopping in and thanks for the comment.

  13. Jasmine, he just wants your money for the surgery. I think you’re doing great by your own efforts. Fuck surgery. <3

    • I don’t know if he gets a kickback or not… but he has been our doctor for a long time and I trust him… I just think he is wrong about this.

  14. Fuck fatty judgers. Judge them for being stupid and them call them on it. Even if they have M.D. after their name. It doesn’t mean they have common sense or do not practice medicine without bringing their own issues into a diagnosis. This doesn’t mean you have to doctor shop, it just means that boundaries work with doctors too. Left-handed people die earlier than right-handers, you don’t see anyone freaking out and cutting off hands for a “what-if” scenario.

    • Wow. I had no idea about left handed people! Leave it to you to have some weird ass facts stored away in your brain ;)

Leave a comment get a hug!